I feel like I have a lot to update and not a lot at the same time. Like always I feel like there is something on the near horizon that I should wait to reach before I update, and then I'm reminded again about my condition- always longing for that which is not yet. Mainly I'm updating because I felt I should get a post in in December and before the new year. (Wait, hold on, a new year is coming?? 2011- what is that? the Future?! Here, arrived?!)
I definitely do not feel prepared to start saying that it's 2011... I feel like I embraced 2010 more because it was graduation year, so it was something I was looking forward to for a long time. But 2011... there's nothing particularly significant coming except more of the same. Is this the beginning of the rest of my life?
The funny thing about being sick is that now whenever I see anyone I haven't seen since then, their first question is- are you feeling better? And now that it's been a full month since my illness, sometimes it kind of confuses me for a second. So- Yes. Yes I am. Whatever crazy illness I had is now gone and past, and I'm hoping to embrace many sick free days again. Life is back to normal. At least it maybe strengthened my immune system? If anything, I now have a new perspective on nursing care, at least to some extent. After laying in a hospital bed for several days, it's a little easier to relate- on a minuscule level at least. I'm not going to even try to say I have any idea what my patients are going through. One of mine this past week had a type of Guillan Barre, so was basically lying in bed unable to significantly move and completely reliant on her family and staff for everything. And she still managed to smile.
Of course, not all my patients have been pleasant smiling model patients. I've had an old man alternate between loving grasping my hand and trying to smack my face. And I most recently spent the longest 12 hour shift of my life trying to remain calm in the midst of a hysterical patient. Does crying count as remaining calm? At least I left the room first (but not before she caught a glimpse of me trying to hold back laughter... it's a coping mechanism). And now I can say I've officially cried at work. It was bound to happen eventually. I mean, seriously, we all know I'm a crier.
Outside of work, life has been basically full of travel the last month. I've been home every other week for the past six weeks (once my unplanned sick visit), and while I do love home and family, I'm quite ready to stay put in one place for a bit. I was very thankful to make it home for my most recent visit, however. It involved a 5.5 hour drive (took the L side of the triangle to Atlanta- ie through Birmingham) through a "snow storm" (I mean, it was snowing for the entire second half- I felt like I was going into light speed...). I made it safely home, and was then able to enjoy a truly White Christmas. We had a lovely walk around the neighborhood amidst big fluffy flakes.
This Christmas was the first of my post-schooling, no-longer-living-under-mom-and-dad's-roof-kind, and it was appropriately weird. But it was still nice. Had good times with the family, which is always lovely.
My most exciting gift this year would have to be the new computer I am writing this from. I was definitely reaching a breaking point with my frustration with the other. Here's hoping this one doesn't make me frustrated for a very long time... I also got some books, DVDs, and too much candy.
The next week is full of even more exciting Christmas Joys for me, first with a mini-weekend reunion with good friends, whose fellowship I have been craving for months. And second, with a family vacation to Hogwarts. Words cannot express the excitement.
Well, I think now is as good a time as any to head off to bed... I hope you've all had a very Merry Christmas! And have a Happy New Year (yay for clichés...)
Friday, December 31, 2010
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Sick... really.
Well, I thought my next post on here would be something like recapping the Deathly Hallows Part 1 Premiere (OH YEAH!). But life took an unexpected turn, and something else pressingly needs updating on. [WARNING: I'm aware this is really long. I won't be too offended if you skip to the end, I promise.]
I was sick. Like, really. Sick. I went to the ER two nights in a row (last Saturday, the 20th, and then Sunday, the 21st), and was then an inpatient at Vanderbilt from Sunday night to Thursday night.
I'm trying to figure out where to even begin... partially because most of the past week is a huge fuzzy memory.
Well, Friday night, I started feeling potentially a little off, but not enough to be sure I was actually sick... then I woke up Saturday morning and just felt generally queasy and food did not sound appetizing. I finally decided to maybe try a smoothie, because it was the only thing that sounded slightly appetizing. Well, not long after sipping on it, the nausea started getting stronger... But I had a wedding to go to, so I was determined to not be sick. In the car on the way there, things were slowly going down hill... and when we pulled into the parking lot- the first (of many many many) upchucks. At that point, I thought- huh, maybe it will just be this one time, and now I'll be okay. Sat through the wedding ceremony, and wasn't feeling much better, but made it through (Thank the Lord!) and then headed to the reception hall. The smell of the food was immediately not helping, and my spirits were very low (very disappointing, because there were a lot of people there I was a lot more excited to see than I was able to show!) I casually relocated myself to a slightly more removed location when the food became overwhelming, and then promptly threw up beside the couch I was sitting on. Luckily, I at least hit the hardwood floor... And by the second wave, someone had moved a trashcan next to me.
Let's just say it was downhill from there. Left the wedding reception without even getting to see the lovely bride and groom (Tara and Brandon, I so wish I had gotten to share in your wonderful day more!), threw up in the car on the way back (luckily we had a trashbag...), and then began a wave of vomit in the room I was staying in... with no relief from the nausea. Shaphan had come up to stay with me, and miserably watched me be miserable for a couple of hours until I finally realized maybe I needed to go see someone... I remember struggling to look at my watch to count my breaths, and thinking "36 breathes a minute... well that's too many" and thinking about what type of acid imbalances I was throwing my body into...
Shaphan and Rebecca Glenn graciously took me to the Brookwood ER, where, after a fretful wait in the waiting room to be seen by triage, I was promptly escorted back to a room and seen by a doctor. If you want to be seen quickly, try rocking back and forth, whimpering, hyperventilating, and holding onto a bucket for dear life. It worked for me. I was set up with some IV fluids, some phenergan, and some pentobarbital; I was reportedly very soon knocked out, not unexpectedly. A couple hours I was awoken later by the doctor feeling much better. Feeling sure they had helped my kick the bug, I went to bed and slept soundly the rest of the night, and awoke feeling weak, but good.
Insistent on sticking to my original plan, I headed back to Nashville in the late morning. I started out the drive strong, but slowly began to weaken and weary... as a safe guard, I called Anna Bedsole to help my stay awake. Well, the longer we talked and the more I drove, the worse I began to feel. It became clear that I probably needed to stop and call someone to come pick me up. I had made it the majority of the way, and was about 50 miles from Nashville when I pulled over at a gas station off of 65.
Thankfully I have amazing roommates, who came to pick me up, even though they had just finished preparing the Thanksgiving meal we were supposed to be sharing together. About an hour later, they arrived to find me sitting outside my car having just vomited yet again. After securing some plastic bags without holes from inside, we started making the trek back to Nashville. I'm told I was essentially vomiting or dry heaving most of the trip. Here is where my memories begin to blur, so the rest of this detailed report is less reliable...
Upon returning to our house, it was clear I needed to go back to the ER. I apparently only knew how to respond "I don't know" when asked what I wanted to do, but thankfully my roommates knew better, and took me to Vanderbilt. Again, after what I'm sure was a decently short, but fretful wait, I was escorted to triage and then a room. This time the drugs did not have such an nice, immediate calming effect. But I do recall seeing random familiar faces of other nurse residents walking in and around my room...
After fluids, Zofran, Ativan.... and I have no idea what else... I still was not finding relief. My roommates kept a faithful watch at my bedside, though I don't remember actually talking to them much... I do have vague memories of them calling people on my phone to let them know I was back in the ER. After a CT of my brain with no indication of causes, they told me they were going to admit me. I remember thinking "oh my gosh, am I really this sick?" but going with it. A couple of nurse residency friends stopped by to say hello, and I'm sure I sufficiently freaked them out. One reported that I looked like I was ready to jump out of my stretcher, constantly pulling my covers off and on myself, and being generally agitated. No wonder they thought they needed to scan my brain...
Well... I got sent up to a general med floor, in the Round Wing... I've never been there before, and let me tell you, I don't remember much. Monday through Thursday is a very general blur... I know my roommates stopped by Monday morning, and I was attempting to eat Jello... and even had an apparently amusing conversation with Valerie about what color I should eat. But like I said, no real clear memory of this.
At some point I got a CT of my abdomen, again negative. And an endoscopy, which I seem to remember someone getting upset because I had been eating, and I tried to explain I didn't know they were going to do the test, and I'd thrown it all up anyway. I can tell you I don't remember getting there or coming back... but I suppose I must have.
On Tuesday my parents asked if they should come up, to which I replied "okay." They arrived not long after, and I think I even tried on my narnia costume while I was there... I'm surprised I didn't vomit on it, but I guess my mom thought it was worth the risk...
Wednesday... I have no idea what happened wednesday, except my parents came back, I assume, and I seem to remember them asking for my wireless password in my house... Oh, and I called in to work to tell them I (obviously) couldn't come in. I know I talked to my assistant manager because I was calling out on the week of the holiday (there's goes that holiday pay...) but I can't recall what words were exchanged. Looking at my phone records, this is also the day that Heike called from China. Again, who knows what I told her, I only vaguely remember seeing her number calling me, and asking my parents a few days later "Did I talk to Heike while I was in the hospital??"
Thursday, the day most of you hopefully joyously celebrated with family, I still was not better. My parents talked my siblings through baking pie and oyster casserole for family thanksgiving, and they went out to eat while I was sent for an MRI of my brain. I had to go down without my glasses on, so vision memories are definitely blurry, but I actually do remember the ride down and back for this particular trip... and the nice MRI guy talking to me. I took a nice doze while it scanned and whirred around my head for 30+ minutes... I guess maybe it was claustrophobic, but I had my eyes closed... I'd like to think hopefully this means I can tell my patients more accurately what to expect when I take them down, but now thinking back on what I remember, I'm not sure that's really the case. Of course, maybe this is just a sign that my patients surely won't remember half of what's going on anyway... at least the ones getting tons of phenergan and ativan too...
After the MRI turned out negative, the doctors said they had run every test they could think of to try to find some treatable cause to whatever was causing my ailment. They started me on some Reglan, to help move food through my stomach better, since apparently my endoscopy had shown a lot of excess fluid still in my stomach (whether this is because I didn't fast before hand or because of gastroparesis (stomach paralysis) is your best guess as well as mine). Feeling slightly better once the Reglan was started, I was discharged and my parents drove me home (much, to I remember, my insistence that I didn't want to drive that far).
Luckily I was knocked out for most of the drive (lasting effects of some gracious phenergan). Upon returning home though, I found myself to be unable to sleep. I tossed and turned in bed for most of the night, and assumed it must be because I had slept so much the rest of the day, and because I was longingly missing my phenergan and ativan... how they had made time blur so pleasantly! Now time seemed to be inching by... A glance at my watch might show that only a few minutes had passed, and I wondered how on earth I was going to survive.
Friday did not inherit much improvement. I sat and napped miserably on the couch most of the day while my family purchased our christmas tree and decorated. I believe there is a picture that will hopefully never be displayed of me miserably hanging one solitary christmas ornament (at least I chose a lovely Irish Cross. Solid.). My smile is more of a grimace. I remained restless most of the day, tried to sleep early, but was awake again after maybe an hour... I watched A Christmas Story with my family (at least I was able to remain solid to one good family tradition), and threw up some more.
I had been faithfully taking my Reglan all day, trusting it should continue to help. That night, sleep evaded me once more. I took many treks from my bedroom to the computer room, watching 10-15 minutes of a TV show on hulu before trying sleep once more.
Saturday morning I was miserable. When my mom came into my room, I told her how I didn't feel like I was ever going to get better. I was weary, depressed, anxious, restless, and exhausted with being sick. I was no longer nauseous, but my stomach felt bloated and weird. I felt utterly weak, barely having enough energy to talk. I figured a week+ of not actually eating anything substantial was catching up to me. I was feeling so bad again that I thought maybe I needed to go back to a doctor. Well, we called my parents' physician and my brother's girlfriend's dad, also a doctor, to get their opinion. My parents' MD told me I would just still need to tough it out, and that as long as I was still holding fluids down, I would be okay. When I got on the phone to talk to Christina's dad, I felt it was probably a waste of time, as the other doctor had had no helpful advice for me. Praise the Lord I was wrong. When I began describing to him how I felt that morning, and he found out I was on Reglan, he immediately said that those were exact side effects that Reglan can often have. Grabbing my bottle, I found the small print at the bottom, underneath the bigger warning that it may cause drowsiness and dizziness, that you should call your doctor immediately if you began experiencing new or worse feelings of depression, restless, agitation, or confusion. Had anyone at the hospital told me this when they started me on it? NO! I had been faithfully taking it, trusting the good meds to help me get better. And as it turns out, the Reglan is what was keeping me feeling bad.
I didn't take any more doses after that phone call. Miss Sherri lovingly came over with ginger tea (good for the stomach, says the chinese), and a wonderful foot massage. By the afternoon, my spirits were already starting to perk up. I actually had longer conversations with my family. I even slightly joked with people again. I had the energy to sit through an entire movie, and TV shows! By that night, I was playing iMAgiNiff with the family, laughing and joking. Talk about a 180 turn.
Sleep, though still slightly slow coming that night, was lovely and uninterrupted. I think I got a good 8 hours, finally.
This morning I successfully at a banana and made the trek to church. Though after the two hour or so excursion I was feeling ready for a nap, I was stilling feeling loads better. And I loaded up and made the ride home to Nashville with Christina today (how providential she was visiting for Thanksgiving, and that she lives in Franklin!) While this afternoon's attempt at soup proved unsuccessful, this evening second journey has been a success, and I'm munching on another banana as I type, actually starting to feel like I might have an appetite returning!
My energy still wanes very quickly (though sitting typing and reading on my computer is much less exhausting than other things!) but I feel confident in saying I am finally on the road to recovery. I'm still uncertain that I'll be able to manage a 12 hour shift Tuesday night, but I am hoping to make it to Neighborhood Group tomorrow night...
If you've actually read this entire post, I am amazingly impressed. I am aware I probably filled it with much more details than you really cared about... but this has been my life for the past week. And what a week it has been.
Mainly, though, I want to thank all of you who have been praying for me faithfully this past week. It wasn't until today really that I realized how many people have been. It is humbling and such a tremendous blessing to realize what a large support group I have around me. Even though my brief (albeit very real) bought of depression Friday-Saturday had me unconvinced God was actually listening or responding to my prayers (I remember shaking my fists in bed towards the ceiling Friday night/Saturday morning thinking "Please, Lord, Please, Just give me SLEEP!"), God had indeed proven faithful, as always.
Now begins the journey of listening to my body and not rushing myself to recovery. Apparently being sick for a week takes longer than a day to get over...
I was sick. Like, really. Sick. I went to the ER two nights in a row (last Saturday, the 20th, and then Sunday, the 21st), and was then an inpatient at Vanderbilt from Sunday night to Thursday night.
I'm trying to figure out where to even begin... partially because most of the past week is a huge fuzzy memory.
Well, Friday night, I started feeling potentially a little off, but not enough to be sure I was actually sick... then I woke up Saturday morning and just felt generally queasy and food did not sound appetizing. I finally decided to maybe try a smoothie, because it was the only thing that sounded slightly appetizing. Well, not long after sipping on it, the nausea started getting stronger... But I had a wedding to go to, so I was determined to not be sick. In the car on the way there, things were slowly going down hill... and when we pulled into the parking lot- the first (of many many many) upchucks. At that point, I thought- huh, maybe it will just be this one time, and now I'll be okay. Sat through the wedding ceremony, and wasn't feeling much better, but made it through (Thank the Lord!) and then headed to the reception hall. The smell of the food was immediately not helping, and my spirits were very low (very disappointing, because there were a lot of people there I was a lot more excited to see than I was able to show!) I casually relocated myself to a slightly more removed location when the food became overwhelming, and then promptly threw up beside the couch I was sitting on. Luckily, I at least hit the hardwood floor... And by the second wave, someone had moved a trashcan next to me.
Let's just say it was downhill from there. Left the wedding reception without even getting to see the lovely bride and groom (Tara and Brandon, I so wish I had gotten to share in your wonderful day more!), threw up in the car on the way back (luckily we had a trashbag...), and then began a wave of vomit in the room I was staying in... with no relief from the nausea. Shaphan had come up to stay with me, and miserably watched me be miserable for a couple of hours until I finally realized maybe I needed to go see someone... I remember struggling to look at my watch to count my breaths, and thinking "36 breathes a minute... well that's too many" and thinking about what type of acid imbalances I was throwing my body into...
Shaphan and Rebecca Glenn graciously took me to the Brookwood ER, where, after a fretful wait in the waiting room to be seen by triage, I was promptly escorted back to a room and seen by a doctor. If you want to be seen quickly, try rocking back and forth, whimpering, hyperventilating, and holding onto a bucket for dear life. It worked for me. I was set up with some IV fluids, some phenergan, and some pentobarbital; I was reportedly very soon knocked out, not unexpectedly. A couple hours I was awoken later by the doctor feeling much better. Feeling sure they had helped my kick the bug, I went to bed and slept soundly the rest of the night, and awoke feeling weak, but good.
Insistent on sticking to my original plan, I headed back to Nashville in the late morning. I started out the drive strong, but slowly began to weaken and weary... as a safe guard, I called Anna Bedsole to help my stay awake. Well, the longer we talked and the more I drove, the worse I began to feel. It became clear that I probably needed to stop and call someone to come pick me up. I had made it the majority of the way, and was about 50 miles from Nashville when I pulled over at a gas station off of 65.
Thankfully I have amazing roommates, who came to pick me up, even though they had just finished preparing the Thanksgiving meal we were supposed to be sharing together. About an hour later, they arrived to find me sitting outside my car having just vomited yet again. After securing some plastic bags without holes from inside, we started making the trek back to Nashville. I'm told I was essentially vomiting or dry heaving most of the trip. Here is where my memories begin to blur, so the rest of this detailed report is less reliable...
Upon returning to our house, it was clear I needed to go back to the ER. I apparently only knew how to respond "I don't know" when asked what I wanted to do, but thankfully my roommates knew better, and took me to Vanderbilt. Again, after what I'm sure was a decently short, but fretful wait, I was escorted to triage and then a room. This time the drugs did not have such an nice, immediate calming effect. But I do recall seeing random familiar faces of other nurse residents walking in and around my room...
After fluids, Zofran, Ativan.... and I have no idea what else... I still was not finding relief. My roommates kept a faithful watch at my bedside, though I don't remember actually talking to them much... I do have vague memories of them calling people on my phone to let them know I was back in the ER. After a CT of my brain with no indication of causes, they told me they were going to admit me. I remember thinking "oh my gosh, am I really this sick?" but going with it. A couple of nurse residency friends stopped by to say hello, and I'm sure I sufficiently freaked them out. One reported that I looked like I was ready to jump out of my stretcher, constantly pulling my covers off and on myself, and being generally agitated. No wonder they thought they needed to scan my brain...
Well... I got sent up to a general med floor, in the Round Wing... I've never been there before, and let me tell you, I don't remember much. Monday through Thursday is a very general blur... I know my roommates stopped by Monday morning, and I was attempting to eat Jello... and even had an apparently amusing conversation with Valerie about what color I should eat. But like I said, no real clear memory of this.
At some point I got a CT of my abdomen, again negative. And an endoscopy, which I seem to remember someone getting upset because I had been eating, and I tried to explain I didn't know they were going to do the test, and I'd thrown it all up anyway. I can tell you I don't remember getting there or coming back... but I suppose I must have.
On Tuesday my parents asked if they should come up, to which I replied "okay." They arrived not long after, and I think I even tried on my narnia costume while I was there... I'm surprised I didn't vomit on it, but I guess my mom thought it was worth the risk...
Wednesday... I have no idea what happened wednesday, except my parents came back, I assume, and I seem to remember them asking for my wireless password in my house... Oh, and I called in to work to tell them I (obviously) couldn't come in. I know I talked to my assistant manager because I was calling out on the week of the holiday (there's goes that holiday pay...) but I can't recall what words were exchanged. Looking at my phone records, this is also the day that Heike called from China. Again, who knows what I told her, I only vaguely remember seeing her number calling me, and asking my parents a few days later "Did I talk to Heike while I was in the hospital??"
Thursday, the day most of you hopefully joyously celebrated with family, I still was not better. My parents talked my siblings through baking pie and oyster casserole for family thanksgiving, and they went out to eat while I was sent for an MRI of my brain. I had to go down without my glasses on, so vision memories are definitely blurry, but I actually do remember the ride down and back for this particular trip... and the nice MRI guy talking to me. I took a nice doze while it scanned and whirred around my head for 30+ minutes... I guess maybe it was claustrophobic, but I had my eyes closed... I'd like to think hopefully this means I can tell my patients more accurately what to expect when I take them down, but now thinking back on what I remember, I'm not sure that's really the case. Of course, maybe this is just a sign that my patients surely won't remember half of what's going on anyway... at least the ones getting tons of phenergan and ativan too...
After the MRI turned out negative, the doctors said they had run every test they could think of to try to find some treatable cause to whatever was causing my ailment. They started me on some Reglan, to help move food through my stomach better, since apparently my endoscopy had shown a lot of excess fluid still in my stomach (whether this is because I didn't fast before hand or because of gastroparesis (stomach paralysis) is your best guess as well as mine). Feeling slightly better once the Reglan was started, I was discharged and my parents drove me home (much, to I remember, my insistence that I didn't want to drive that far).
Luckily I was knocked out for most of the drive (lasting effects of some gracious phenergan). Upon returning home though, I found myself to be unable to sleep. I tossed and turned in bed for most of the night, and assumed it must be because I had slept so much the rest of the day, and because I was longingly missing my phenergan and ativan... how they had made time blur so pleasantly! Now time seemed to be inching by... A glance at my watch might show that only a few minutes had passed, and I wondered how on earth I was going to survive.
Friday did not inherit much improvement. I sat and napped miserably on the couch most of the day while my family purchased our christmas tree and decorated. I believe there is a picture that will hopefully never be displayed of me miserably hanging one solitary christmas ornament (at least I chose a lovely Irish Cross. Solid.). My smile is more of a grimace. I remained restless most of the day, tried to sleep early, but was awake again after maybe an hour... I watched A Christmas Story with my family (at least I was able to remain solid to one good family tradition), and threw up some more.
I had been faithfully taking my Reglan all day, trusting it should continue to help. That night, sleep evaded me once more. I took many treks from my bedroom to the computer room, watching 10-15 minutes of a TV show on hulu before trying sleep once more.
Saturday morning I was miserable. When my mom came into my room, I told her how I didn't feel like I was ever going to get better. I was weary, depressed, anxious, restless, and exhausted with being sick. I was no longer nauseous, but my stomach felt bloated and weird. I felt utterly weak, barely having enough energy to talk. I figured a week+ of not actually eating anything substantial was catching up to me. I was feeling so bad again that I thought maybe I needed to go back to a doctor. Well, we called my parents' physician and my brother's girlfriend's dad, also a doctor, to get their opinion. My parents' MD told me I would just still need to tough it out, and that as long as I was still holding fluids down, I would be okay. When I got on the phone to talk to Christina's dad, I felt it was probably a waste of time, as the other doctor had had no helpful advice for me. Praise the Lord I was wrong. When I began describing to him how I felt that morning, and he found out I was on Reglan, he immediately said that those were exact side effects that Reglan can often have. Grabbing my bottle, I found the small print at the bottom, underneath the bigger warning that it may cause drowsiness and dizziness, that you should call your doctor immediately if you began experiencing new or worse feelings of depression, restless, agitation, or confusion. Had anyone at the hospital told me this when they started me on it? NO! I had been faithfully taking it, trusting the good meds to help me get better. And as it turns out, the Reglan is what was keeping me feeling bad.
I didn't take any more doses after that phone call. Miss Sherri lovingly came over with ginger tea (good for the stomach, says the chinese), and a wonderful foot massage. By the afternoon, my spirits were already starting to perk up. I actually had longer conversations with my family. I even slightly joked with people again. I had the energy to sit through an entire movie, and TV shows! By that night, I was playing iMAgiNiff with the family, laughing and joking. Talk about a 180 turn.
Sleep, though still slightly slow coming that night, was lovely and uninterrupted. I think I got a good 8 hours, finally.
This morning I successfully at a banana and made the trek to church. Though after the two hour or so excursion I was feeling ready for a nap, I was stilling feeling loads better. And I loaded up and made the ride home to Nashville with Christina today (how providential she was visiting for Thanksgiving, and that she lives in Franklin!) While this afternoon's attempt at soup proved unsuccessful, this evening second journey has been a success, and I'm munching on another banana as I type, actually starting to feel like I might have an appetite returning!
My energy still wanes very quickly (though sitting typing and reading on my computer is much less exhausting than other things!) but I feel confident in saying I am finally on the road to recovery. I'm still uncertain that I'll be able to manage a 12 hour shift Tuesday night, but I am hoping to make it to Neighborhood Group tomorrow night...
If you've actually read this entire post, I am amazingly impressed. I am aware I probably filled it with much more details than you really cared about... but this has been my life for the past week. And what a week it has been.
Mainly, though, I want to thank all of you who have been praying for me faithfully this past week. It wasn't until today really that I realized how many people have been. It is humbling and such a tremendous blessing to realize what a large support group I have around me. Even though my brief (albeit very real) bought of depression Friday-Saturday had me unconvinced God was actually listening or responding to my prayers (I remember shaking my fists in bed towards the ceiling Friday night/Saturday morning thinking "Please, Lord, Please, Just give me SLEEP!"), God had indeed proven faithful, as always.
Now begins the journey of listening to my body and not rushing myself to recovery. Apparently being sick for a week takes longer than a day to get over...
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Leaving my safety net behind...
I realize that I am being a very bad blog updater. But, at least I am hitting an update a month, yes? It could be worse.
When I posted last, I was just starting my orientation on night shift- here we are, 6 weeks later, and I have officially finished orientation and spent one week on my own. That's right- for the first time I spent 12 hours as the only person directly responsible for two patients. I had no one whose only job for the shift was to look out for me. Unfortunately (or... really fortunately) I don't really have any exciting stories to share from my first week. Well... one of my patients was just amusing... but yes. Everyone was still alive and breathing when I left, so I will count that as a success! I'm definitely starting to feel more at home in the Neuro Unit, and am looking forward to growing and learning more these next several months. Also, I'm getting a lot better at driving the beds- they have a motor in them! It's fairly intense.
The night shift life? I'm getting more used to the hours- in fact, even on days when I don't need to be up late, I still find myself staying awake until at least 1am or later, and it's rare for me to be awake before 10 or 11, if not later. And of course, there are multiple days a week that I spend the whole day in bed- and even if I've only slept for 8 hours, something about sleeping from 8am-4pm is still a little odd. But I'm getting used to it. It's even starting to throw me off when I go to bed when it's still dark out. And it's always funny when I'm literally getting into bed when my roommates are getting out of it; one of them has clinicals for nursing school, so earlier this week when I was getting ready for bed at 5am (I had been put on call for the night, but had slept all day), she was waking up.
The upside to night shift is that I have plenty of time to watch movies or tv shows I've been meaning to... Netflix has become my new friend. And I have tons of time to work on new knitting projects. The downside? well... I'm sitting in a room watching movies and knitting. There's some limitation of human interaction at 3am. Sad but true.
I'm getting ready to leave for church- where I'll stand in front of the congregation and be recognized as a new member! Exciting times! I'm enjoying getting to know people there better, and looking forward to continue building relationships.
Also, I feel the need to admit that living in Nashville has already got me dialing into the country music station a bit more often. Don't tell my sister.
Right now, though, I'm mainly looking forward to the end of the week. Off to Birmingham to see the midnight viewing of Deathly Hallows, part one, spend time with the boyfriend, and go to a wedding of two good friends. Overall, I'm anticipating a very fun weekend. And trying not to think about spending thanksgiving alone... at least we're having a thanksgiving potluck at work, right?
When I posted last, I was just starting my orientation on night shift- here we are, 6 weeks later, and I have officially finished orientation and spent one week on my own. That's right- for the first time I spent 12 hours as the only person directly responsible for two patients. I had no one whose only job for the shift was to look out for me. Unfortunately (or... really fortunately) I don't really have any exciting stories to share from my first week. Well... one of my patients was just amusing... but yes. Everyone was still alive and breathing when I left, so I will count that as a success! I'm definitely starting to feel more at home in the Neuro Unit, and am looking forward to growing and learning more these next several months. Also, I'm getting a lot better at driving the beds- they have a motor in them! It's fairly intense.
The night shift life? I'm getting more used to the hours- in fact, even on days when I don't need to be up late, I still find myself staying awake until at least 1am or later, and it's rare for me to be awake before 10 or 11, if not later. And of course, there are multiple days a week that I spend the whole day in bed- and even if I've only slept for 8 hours, something about sleeping from 8am-4pm is still a little odd. But I'm getting used to it. It's even starting to throw me off when I go to bed when it's still dark out. And it's always funny when I'm literally getting into bed when my roommates are getting out of it; one of them has clinicals for nursing school, so earlier this week when I was getting ready for bed at 5am (I had been put on call for the night, but had slept all day), she was waking up.
The upside to night shift is that I have plenty of time to watch movies or tv shows I've been meaning to... Netflix has become my new friend. And I have tons of time to work on new knitting projects. The downside? well... I'm sitting in a room watching movies and knitting. There's some limitation of human interaction at 3am. Sad but true.
I'm getting ready to leave for church- where I'll stand in front of the congregation and be recognized as a new member! Exciting times! I'm enjoying getting to know people there better, and looking forward to continue building relationships.
Also, I feel the need to admit that living in Nashville has already got me dialing into the country music station a bit more often. Don't tell my sister.
Right now, though, I'm mainly looking forward to the end of the week. Off to Birmingham to see the midnight viewing of Deathly Hallows, part one, spend time with the boyfriend, and go to a wedding of two good friends. Overall, I'm anticipating a very fun weekend. And trying not to think about spending thanksgiving alone... at least we're having a thanksgiving potluck at work, right?
Monday, October 4, 2010
Ready to be a night owl?
I'm finding it a little hard to believe that I'm actually halfway through my orientation. On Thursday I officially start on night shifts, where I'll be staying for the foreseeable future. And then, in just over a month I'll be officially off orientation and will no longer have a shadow nurse that I can just have go run do something for me if I need it. In some ways I feel ready, and in others I feel nowhere close. Some days I feel completely comfortable handling my assignment on my own, and others I feel like I just barely keep up. But it's a learning process, and I definitely won't become an expert immediately. I'm very grateful for the support around me in the staff on the floor. I know there will always be someone close by to answer my questions or give me a hand if I need it.
I have seen a variety of patients, some with really bizarre cases. One day when I had two patients from out of state, it really hit me that I'm working somewhere that other hospitals send the people they don't know what to do with. And that's pretty cool!
I'm still getting used to the ebb and flow of my schedule. When I work three days in a row, the time goes by quickly, and I hardly have time to do anything but work. But then, when I have a stretch of off days, I kind of have to search for things to do- because it's not like I have tons of tests to study for and books to read... I'm still trying to figure out some regular things to fill my time with... though, seeing as I'm about to switch to night shift, I feel like it's going to take a little while longer before I start figuring out what my "real" "regular" routine is going to be.
Some things that I have settled into include a church- City church of East Nashville, and a neighborhood group within that church. I'm excited to begin plugging into the community there more.
I am also amazingly grateful to be able to tell you that we just found out my Granddaddy is officially in remission from his Leukemia. Considering that when we first found out about the cancer, I wasn't even sure he would make it to my graduation, and the statistics of this type of cancer in his age range, this is miraculous! I feel so blessed that God has granted us more time together, and it does make me a little sad that I'm not closer and can't spend more time with them.
Well, that's a brief summation of life. Still getting used to Nashville, still working on getting more plugged into community here, but I'm definitely on the road towards it. And I know God is definitely with me here within all the changes.
I have seen a variety of patients, some with really bizarre cases. One day when I had two patients from out of state, it really hit me that I'm working somewhere that other hospitals send the people they don't know what to do with. And that's pretty cool!
I'm still getting used to the ebb and flow of my schedule. When I work three days in a row, the time goes by quickly, and I hardly have time to do anything but work. But then, when I have a stretch of off days, I kind of have to search for things to do- because it's not like I have tons of tests to study for and books to read... I'm still trying to figure out some regular things to fill my time with... though, seeing as I'm about to switch to night shift, I feel like it's going to take a little while longer before I start figuring out what my "real" "regular" routine is going to be.
Some things that I have settled into include a church- City church of East Nashville, and a neighborhood group within that church. I'm excited to begin plugging into the community there more.
I am also amazingly grateful to be able to tell you that we just found out my Granddaddy is officially in remission from his Leukemia. Considering that when we first found out about the cancer, I wasn't even sure he would make it to my graduation, and the statistics of this type of cancer in his age range, this is miraculous! I feel so blessed that God has granted us more time together, and it does make me a little sad that I'm not closer and can't spend more time with them.
Well, that's a brief summation of life. Still getting used to Nashville, still working on getting more plugged into community here, but I'm definitely on the road towards it. And I know God is definitely with me here within all the changes.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Let's get oriented!
So, I'm two full weeks into my orientation to the Neurology/Neurosurgery ICU, and so far, things have gone well. My first day I probably made every stupid little mistake I could, but every day I feel a little more comfortable. Of course, I haven't had any patients do something too crazy on me yet... but all in due time.
We had our "neuro boot camp" this week, which was actually really awesome, because it was a great highlighted review of all the big main neuro diagnoses. Also, at the end of the two days, I felt excited about being a neuro nurse, and getting to see more of all our variety of patients. Not to mention that I got my very own level/laser for leveling EVDs (drains that go into people's brains). This, I think, makes me very cool, and very geeky at the same time. Also, I got excited at the thought of getting to teach a powerpoint lecture to a new set of residents next year. This probably really cements the geeky diagnosis.
This post feels a little awkwardly written, maybe because I've just worked 24 of the past 48 hours... and 36 of the past 96. Hmm. Right now my schedule feels busier, because I have two class days a week, paired with 2 work days... so even though time wise is about the same, there's 4 days a week I'm booked- so I'm missing and off day. I'm looking forward to things settling into a more "normal" routine, though every 6 weeks or so I'll have another class day... until June. Maybe one of the "down sides" of the residency program... but I'm not complaining, because I am so grateful for all of this experience and learning, and really excited about working in Neuro (seriously, every day I think I get more excited about it.)
Well, I think I'm going to go do something that requires less thinking now because I feel like I'm not really following a steady train of thought as much as I'd like to while I'm trying to write this. Evidence to you as to why I've been so bad at writing... Even though I don't feel insanely busy... I really am pretty busy. Time is just escaping me.
Oh, I have a desk in my room now, with lots of fun and pretty things on it. Hopefully in the next two days I'll maybe get the rest of the stuff hung on my walls, and then I can take pictures!
We had our "neuro boot camp" this week, which was actually really awesome, because it was a great highlighted review of all the big main neuro diagnoses. Also, at the end of the two days, I felt excited about being a neuro nurse, and getting to see more of all our variety of patients. Not to mention that I got my very own level/laser for leveling EVDs (drains that go into people's brains). This, I think, makes me very cool, and very geeky at the same time. Also, I got excited at the thought of getting to teach a powerpoint lecture to a new set of residents next year. This probably really cements the geeky diagnosis.
This post feels a little awkwardly written, maybe because I've just worked 24 of the past 48 hours... and 36 of the past 96. Hmm. Right now my schedule feels busier, because I have two class days a week, paired with 2 work days... so even though time wise is about the same, there's 4 days a week I'm booked- so I'm missing and off day. I'm looking forward to things settling into a more "normal" routine, though every 6 weeks or so I'll have another class day... until June. Maybe one of the "down sides" of the residency program... but I'm not complaining, because I am so grateful for all of this experience and learning, and really excited about working in Neuro (seriously, every day I think I get more excited about it.)
Well, I think I'm going to go do something that requires less thinking now because I feel like I'm not really following a steady train of thought as much as I'd like to while I'm trying to write this. Evidence to you as to why I've been so bad at writing... Even though I don't feel insanely busy... I really am pretty busy. Time is just escaping me.
Oh, I have a desk in my room now, with lots of fun and pretty things on it. Hopefully in the next two days I'll maybe get the rest of the stuff hung on my walls, and then I can take pictures!
Monday, August 30, 2010
I THINK I can...
I'll be honest. I've been thinking about updating for a while, but once I got so close to Match Day, I felt like I might as well wait until I could tell everyone what unit I was going to... again, reflecting my continual urge to wait until "something" happens, often forgetting that I'm always in the middle of something- life!
But, I am pleased to tell you that I have been placed in the Neuro intensive care unit. I am quite excited at this next challenge, and so glad to have a "home" where I can start laying some groundwork as I work to become a competent nurse. I know I am going to learn a lot, and I'm excited for the challenge! They see lots of stuff in Neuro, like strokes and other brain injuries, brain and head and neck surgeries, neuromuscular disorders, and more. I'm excited for all I'm going to learn!
Also, I have now moved into my house in Nashville, and my lovely roommates are all here, as well. I knew the first 7 weeks of the program were going to be full of transitions, from moving my bed to moving around at work, and it definitely was. I'm just now starting to feel like the dust is beginning to settle- or at least, no new dust is being kicked up around me... The house is great! I love the location, and it has the perfect amount of space for us. The neighborhood is in a great location, and I love walking into work in the mornings past people running and walking their dogs, and all the fun houses. The roommates and I have started exploring some things in Nashville, like Shakespeare in the Park, the Frist Center, and local sushi places, and we are very excited for more exploring to come. I've also been making a tour of churches, and will be glad once I decide on a church home and start to get a little more plugged in.
Overall, I am still feeling incredibly blessed by God's provision in this move, while still also feeling the tension that such a move provides, with an assurance that God will be working out all the things yet to be settled, just as He has everything else.
Once I get my desk and am finally completely unpacked, I'll try to post some pictures (probably on facebook) for your viewing pleasure.
In other news, I finally got around to finishing the (original) Mortal Instruments trilogy by Cassandra Clare (that has now been signed for another 3 book story arch, and a trilogy prequel, the first of which comes out tomorrow...) and I highly recommend it to anyone who enjoys young adult/urban fantasy. Definitely a fun read.
There is much more I could talk about, like my cousin getting married, family reunions, etc. But I'll leave it at this for now. I will try to update a bit more consistently in the future, so I won't get so behind!
But, I am pleased to tell you that I have been placed in the Neuro intensive care unit. I am quite excited at this next challenge, and so glad to have a "home" where I can start laying some groundwork as I work to become a competent nurse. I know I am going to learn a lot, and I'm excited for the challenge! They see lots of stuff in Neuro, like strokes and other brain injuries, brain and head and neck surgeries, neuromuscular disorders, and more. I'm excited for all I'm going to learn!
Also, I have now moved into my house in Nashville, and my lovely roommates are all here, as well. I knew the first 7 weeks of the program were going to be full of transitions, from moving my bed to moving around at work, and it definitely was. I'm just now starting to feel like the dust is beginning to settle- or at least, no new dust is being kicked up around me... The house is great! I love the location, and it has the perfect amount of space for us. The neighborhood is in a great location, and I love walking into work in the mornings past people running and walking their dogs, and all the fun houses. The roommates and I have started exploring some things in Nashville, like Shakespeare in the Park, the Frist Center, and local sushi places, and we are very excited for more exploring to come. I've also been making a tour of churches, and will be glad once I decide on a church home and start to get a little more plugged in.
Overall, I am still feeling incredibly blessed by God's provision in this move, while still also feeling the tension that such a move provides, with an assurance that God will be working out all the things yet to be settled, just as He has everything else.
Once I get my desk and am finally completely unpacked, I'll try to post some pictures (probably on facebook) for your viewing pleasure.
In other news, I finally got around to finishing the (original) Mortal Instruments trilogy by Cassandra Clare (that has now been signed for another 3 book story arch, and a trilogy prequel, the first of which comes out tomorrow...) and I highly recommend it to anyone who enjoys young adult/urban fantasy. Definitely a fun read.
There is much more I could talk about, like my cousin getting married, family reunions, etc. But I'll leave it at this for now. I will try to update a bit more consistently in the future, so I won't get so behind!
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Is this real life?
I am pleased to be able to start this post with bundles of good news. I have successfully taken and passed my NCLEX exam, and can officially say I am a Registered Nurse. That's right, if I wanted to, every time I sign my name, I could sign Erin Wert, RN. I should really practice... it's going to be weird not writing SUNS (Samford University Nursing Student), but really exciting, too. It's still a little hard to believe, though.
Not only am a officially registered to practice the field that I've spent the past four years studying and preparing for, I also have found a new residence! Next year I'll be living just 6 blocks from Vanderbilt with 3 other girls who I am very excited to get to know better. All fellow RUFers, one a new intern at Vandy, plus, bonus, we'll be living next door to the male Vandy intern and some of his friends. I am excited to see what the future will hold in this new abode. I can't wait for us all to move in and start making it cozy.
Last bit of "life-changing" news- today I drove home in a new (okay, well, new-er) car! It's a charcoal gray/black '06 Toyota Corolla. I'm pretty excited about it, and I hope it treats me well. I still am pondering what to name it, and trying to figure out if there is a way to actually make the remote locks work- but I'm just excited to actually be able to unlock all four doors with one button instead of doing back bends to reach all the locks!
And now that all of that is taken care of and filed in the "completed" section of my life, I am face-to-face with the reality that I will be driving to Nashville in two weeks and not coming back. Okay, that's a lie, I'll be back the next weekend for my cousin's wedding- but after that? forget it! Okay, still a lie, but the point is, I will be moving to Nashville- I need to put things like "switch driver's license" and "register car in TN" on my to-do list... Not to mention I'll have my first day of orientation July 12th. I will be rotating through various units for 7 weeks, and then on August 30th, I will find out where I'll work for the rest of the year- exciting! And then, probably, I will begin working night shift, which kind of scares me, but I'll learn how to make it work.
Right now I'm frantically trying to go through all of my stuff to sort through what I need and don't need and what is coming to Nashville. You'll have to understand frantically is a fairly relative term, though. So far today I've done nil on that, but seeing as I did buy a new car, I feel it's pulling a little weight on the to-do list today... Still, I should probably get on that. If my allergies will let me. I've realized that it's really just not fair that some people can actually clean and sort through their stuff without bursting into fits of sneezes and having to put up with days of runny noses after. And some people even enjoy it! I wonder if I didn't have the former problem if I'd find it more enjoyable, too...
It's safe to say, though, that with the three biggest question marks on my to do list taken care of, I'm feeling a lot better now. Knowing I'll have things like a roof over my head and basic transportation, not to mention, a job, is very comforting. And blessings that I too often do not appreciate as much as I ought. God has been so great at providing all I need, and I hope I do not forget it as I head into this year full of transitions. He really is amazing.
Not only am a officially registered to practice the field that I've spent the past four years studying and preparing for, I also have found a new residence! Next year I'll be living just 6 blocks from Vanderbilt with 3 other girls who I am very excited to get to know better. All fellow RUFers, one a new intern at Vandy, plus, bonus, we'll be living next door to the male Vandy intern and some of his friends. I am excited to see what the future will hold in this new abode. I can't wait for us all to move in and start making it cozy.
Last bit of "life-changing" news- today I drove home in a new (okay, well, new-er) car! It's a charcoal gray/black '06 Toyota Corolla. I'm pretty excited about it, and I hope it treats me well. I still am pondering what to name it, and trying to figure out if there is a way to actually make the remote locks work- but I'm just excited to actually be able to unlock all four doors with one button instead of doing back bends to reach all the locks!
And now that all of that is taken care of and filed in the "completed" section of my life, I am face-to-face with the reality that I will be driving to Nashville in two weeks and not coming back. Okay, that's a lie, I'll be back the next weekend for my cousin's wedding- but after that? forget it! Okay, still a lie, but the point is, I will be moving to Nashville- I need to put things like "switch driver's license" and "register car in TN" on my to-do list... Not to mention I'll have my first day of orientation July 12th. I will be rotating through various units for 7 weeks, and then on August 30th, I will find out where I'll work for the rest of the year- exciting! And then, probably, I will begin working night shift, which kind of scares me, but I'll learn how to make it work.
Right now I'm frantically trying to go through all of my stuff to sort through what I need and don't need and what is coming to Nashville. You'll have to understand frantically is a fairly relative term, though. So far today I've done nil on that, but seeing as I did buy a new car, I feel it's pulling a little weight on the to-do list today... Still, I should probably get on that. If my allergies will let me. I've realized that it's really just not fair that some people can actually clean and sort through their stuff without bursting into fits of sneezes and having to put up with days of runny noses after. And some people even enjoy it! I wonder if I didn't have the former problem if I'd find it more enjoyable, too...
It's safe to say, though, that with the three biggest question marks on my to do list taken care of, I'm feeling a lot better now. Knowing I'll have things like a roof over my head and basic transportation, not to mention, a job, is very comforting. And blessings that I too often do not appreciate as much as I ought. God has been so great at providing all I need, and I hope I do not forget it as I head into this year full of transitions. He really is amazing.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Postgrad...
The name of this post reminds me that I never got around to seeing that movie, which is kind of sad, because I fully intended to. Mainly because I feel some sort of loyalty to Gilmore Girls actors. Same reason I started watching Parenthood.
Anyway...
I am officially a college graduate. Just call me Erin Wert, BSN. Hopefully in a few weeks I can also add ,RN. to that. Most popular question for everyone to ask me right now? "When are you taking the NCLEX?" Least favorite thing to answer and then try to explain? "I don't know yet. I have to wait for my application to be processed by the TN board of nursing, and for them to give the okay to Pearson Vue to give me my ATT (authorization to test) which will then give me the okay to sign up for a day/time to take it.
Needless to say, I am anxious to be able to schedule this, and move on. And I should probably be doing more study questions than I've done so far. But I did take a review course. And I even did one chapter of questions on my own after that. And I will do more... tomorrow.
Just like I will go through my stuff... tomorrow. This is probably a bad theme in my life, and eventually, tomorrow will have to be today. The moral of this story? Erin has too much stuff.
Erin also has a new iPhone, and she's having fun playing with it. If you have any good app suggestions, let me know! I probably becoming addicted. Such is life.
I'm starting to feel the time crunch until July 12th. I mean, before graduation, it seemed like a decent while away, and granted, there are still 6 good weeks before then... that's still only 6 weeks! 2 of those I'm spending house sitting, and I want to be in Nashville before then, so that's really less time... yeah... its going to go by fast.
I would like to note that God has provided so much as I get ready to go to Nashville- so many different contacts and such, and it's just amazing to me. And I hope that I will continue to remember this as I actually start to make the move and live the life. I know next year is going to be full of so many changes and transitions, and that it's not going to be easy, but I hope I will remember that God is in control, and that I don't need to worry, but to trust his goodness and faithfulness.
I am definitely entering a season where I feel a loss of control and an uncertainty about the future. My sinful nature would tell me to freak out, worry, obsess, etc. but the Spirit tells me to breathe, take peace, rest in God's word and faithfulness, trust Him, and to enjoy the blessings God has given me. Which, I will tell you, have been given in an overwhelming abundance.
Anyway...
I am officially a college graduate. Just call me Erin Wert, BSN. Hopefully in a few weeks I can also add ,RN. to that. Most popular question for everyone to ask me right now? "When are you taking the NCLEX?" Least favorite thing to answer and then try to explain? "I don't know yet. I have to wait for my application to be processed by the TN board of nursing, and for them to give the okay to Pearson Vue to give me my ATT (authorization to test) which will then give me the okay to sign up for a day/time to take it.
Needless to say, I am anxious to be able to schedule this, and move on. And I should probably be doing more study questions than I've done so far. But I did take a review course. And I even did one chapter of questions on my own after that. And I will do more... tomorrow.
Just like I will go through my stuff... tomorrow. This is probably a bad theme in my life, and eventually, tomorrow will have to be today. The moral of this story? Erin has too much stuff.
Erin also has a new iPhone, and she's having fun playing with it. If you have any good app suggestions, let me know! I probably becoming addicted. Such is life.
I'm starting to feel the time crunch until July 12th. I mean, before graduation, it seemed like a decent while away, and granted, there are still 6 good weeks before then... that's still only 6 weeks! 2 of those I'm spending house sitting, and I want to be in Nashville before then, so that's really less time... yeah... its going to go by fast.
I would like to note that God has provided so much as I get ready to go to Nashville- so many different contacts and such, and it's just amazing to me. And I hope that I will continue to remember this as I actually start to make the move and live the life. I know next year is going to be full of so many changes and transitions, and that it's not going to be easy, but I hope I will remember that God is in control, and that I don't need to worry, but to trust his goodness and faithfulness.
I am definitely entering a season where I feel a loss of control and an uncertainty about the future. My sinful nature would tell me to freak out, worry, obsess, etc. but the Spirit tells me to breathe, take peace, rest in God's word and faithfulness, trust Him, and to enjoy the blessings God has given me. Which, I will tell you, have been given in an overwhelming abundance.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Real Job, Real Life.
I have officially recieved my first real life job offer. I suppose I can't technically say that I officially have a job yet, because I haven't technically fully accepted it yet. But, seeing as I fully intend to, I think it's safe to say that I will be working at Vanderbilt University Medical Center next year, as a Nurse Resident in critical care. I will get to rotate around to the various critical care units for 6 weeks, and then I will be "matched" onto one unit for the rest of the year, and will most likely work a remaining year, and who knows how much longer.
I don't think I have words to describe how ecstatic I am. It's so weird to think back at how God has been drawing me towards this more and more, and how I really developed a desire to work at Vanderbilt, and how I also got the okay to move forward! I know it will be a lot of hard work and a huge growing experience, but it will also be awesome. I am so excited to start working and growing as a nurse. And I know that I will learn so much at Vanderbilt. Wow. I can't believe I can officially say that I am going to Nashville. There is such peace in having a small piece of the rest of the puzzle of my life put in place. Though, of course, with that piece comes plenty of other things to worry about- but I'll put those off for at least one night- hah!
I am officially done with class. I have a take home final to finish, and our big senior seminar capstone project to complete, but for the most part, class work wise, I am done. Tomorrow morning I start my preceptorship in the CVSU at Trinity, which I'm very excited about. Life is going to be busy the next month, and I'm sure I'm going to tired and need lots of energy, but I am also so excited. I am so excited to get back at the bedside and do some real nursing care again. I have been missing it during management clinicals.
5 and a half weeks, and I will be graduated from college. Is anyone else finding this ridiculous? I am so ready, and so not ready. Isn't that life?
I don't think I have words to describe how ecstatic I am. It's so weird to think back at how God has been drawing me towards this more and more, and how I really developed a desire to work at Vanderbilt, and how I also got the okay to move forward! I know it will be a lot of hard work and a huge growing experience, but it will also be awesome. I am so excited to start working and growing as a nurse. And I know that I will learn so much at Vanderbilt. Wow. I can't believe I can officially say that I am going to Nashville. There is such peace in having a small piece of the rest of the puzzle of my life put in place. Though, of course, with that piece comes plenty of other things to worry about- but I'll put those off for at least one night- hah!
I am officially done with class. I have a take home final to finish, and our big senior seminar capstone project to complete, but for the most part, class work wise, I am done. Tomorrow morning I start my preceptorship in the CVSU at Trinity, which I'm very excited about. Life is going to be busy the next month, and I'm sure I'm going to tired and need lots of energy, but I am also so excited. I am so excited to get back at the bedside and do some real nursing care again. I have been missing it during management clinicals.
5 and a half weeks, and I will be graduated from college. Is anyone else finding this ridiculous? I am so ready, and so not ready. Isn't that life?
Friday, March 26, 2010
A Providential Break
So, Spring Break has been over for almost a week, but I'm still full of stories to tell.
The beginning of the break was the annual SMC Mega Tour; this year we headed to Chicago with a bus of 36 members (and 11 of them male!). Being on the presidential side of tour instead of the member side, or even "fun officer" side is a much different experience. It involves weeks and months of wondering if everything is going to come together and if the money is actually going to be there like your hypothetical budget says it will and so much more. And yet the worrying is always for naught, because God always provides. Some highlights from the trip:
Also, the first weather predictions had it being cold and stormy the entire time we were there, especially Tuesday. Luckily, God moved the storms through faster and Monday and Tuesday we were blessed with wonderful, glorious weather!
And then there were some unexpected surprises, like having to make a run to an emergency health care center to get one of the choir members a prescription for antibiotics and other drugs she severely needed. And yet, God worked out the timing so well, and all necessary changes were made with complete smoothness. Or another choir member having a tachycardic episode on the ride home- a little scary, but providential that I was there to provide reassurance and to also be able to call and get advice from more seasoned professionals when an hour or more in, things were still being funky. I have definitely learned over the past couple of weeks how I will never be "off duty" as a nurse- but it kind of excites me. I love being able to help people, and I feel so blessed to have extra knowledge to be able to help in medical situations, and am looking forward to growing in competence over the years. My one main goal after graduation? Growing and learning as a nurse- I want to be an excellent nurse, who has grace and expertise in my craft and skill. I know it's a long road and I have so much to learn, but I'm excited to learn and grow!
I had been dreading the rest of spring break, because I knew I was going to go home and my parents were going to leave less than 24 hours later to visit my brother in France. 4 days at home alone aren't exactly what I consider an ideal vacation. But, actually, it was amazingly wonderful, and I was never bored to tears. There was a wonderful balance of rest and recuperation, plus reconnecting with people I love. I caught up on TV shows, had a nice lunch with my sister, got to spend time with my cousins, had dinner and a movie with my grandparents, helped my family out by working at the Kaleidoscope Shop, and had lunch and time to reconnect with my favorite set of pseudo-parents-Ms. Sherri and Mr. Marshall.
And now here I am, less than 50 days from graduation, only 5 assignments left for class, most of which will be finished by next week, hopefully... and wondering what in the world my April is going to look like, with my Clinical Preceptorship starting and I have to figure out how I'm going to work 3 12-hour shifts a week, but also still stay semi in touch with the rest of my life... It's going to be an interesting last month and a half of school, but exciting, too. I'm just afraid I'm going to turn around and it will be over...
The beginning of the break was the annual SMC Mega Tour; this year we headed to Chicago with a bus of 36 members (and 11 of them male!). Being on the presidential side of tour instead of the member side, or even "fun officer" side is a much different experience. It involves weeks and months of wondering if everything is going to come together and if the money is actually going to be there like your hypothetical budget says it will and so much more. And yet the worrying is always for naught, because God always provides. Some highlights from the trip:
- Pacific Garden Mission: getting to hear the testimonies and participate in the joyful, soulful worship of people who have been pulled from the depths by our amazing God.
- Going to the church where Jodee Lewis (of The Spares- I love them!) leads worship!
- Worshiping and fellowshipping with members of Polish Evangelical Fellowship. God truly crosses any boundaries, including cultural, and unites us all as one family in Christ! The love these people shared with us was beautiful and so encouraging, and I feel so blessed to have been able to also encourage them. Jak się masz! Dobry! Dziękuję!
- Getting to sing for various school children, who thought we were super stars!
- After rocking out various assembly lines, getting to play mafia... in Chicago
- Getting to eat homemade pizza cooked by Sister Emma, and mingling with some beautiful, sweet poor elderly, and then encouraging them through song.
- Meeting Sister Erin, from New Zealand!
- Getting to hang out at the zoo all afternoon and seeing the amazing, crazy wonder of God's creation. Especially getting to bond with the monkeys and apes. I feel like we understand each other.
- Walking the Magnificent Mile in BEAUTIFUL weather- high 40s-low 50s, blue, sunny skies
- And of course, all the fellowship with choir people- talent show, encourager bags, just generally being with each other. I love choir!
Also, the first weather predictions had it being cold and stormy the entire time we were there, especially Tuesday. Luckily, God moved the storms through faster and Monday and Tuesday we were blessed with wonderful, glorious weather!
And then there were some unexpected surprises, like having to make a run to an emergency health care center to get one of the choir members a prescription for antibiotics and other drugs she severely needed. And yet, God worked out the timing so well, and all necessary changes were made with complete smoothness. Or another choir member having a tachycardic episode on the ride home- a little scary, but providential that I was there to provide reassurance and to also be able to call and get advice from more seasoned professionals when an hour or more in, things were still being funky. I have definitely learned over the past couple of weeks how I will never be "off duty" as a nurse- but it kind of excites me. I love being able to help people, and I feel so blessed to have extra knowledge to be able to help in medical situations, and am looking forward to growing in competence over the years. My one main goal after graduation? Growing and learning as a nurse- I want to be an excellent nurse, who has grace and expertise in my craft and skill. I know it's a long road and I have so much to learn, but I'm excited to learn and grow!
I had been dreading the rest of spring break, because I knew I was going to go home and my parents were going to leave less than 24 hours later to visit my brother in France. 4 days at home alone aren't exactly what I consider an ideal vacation. But, actually, it was amazingly wonderful, and I was never bored to tears. There was a wonderful balance of rest and recuperation, plus reconnecting with people I love. I caught up on TV shows, had a nice lunch with my sister, got to spend time with my cousins, had dinner and a movie with my grandparents, helped my family out by working at the Kaleidoscope Shop, and had lunch and time to reconnect with my favorite set of pseudo-parents-Ms. Sherri and Mr. Marshall.
And now here I am, less than 50 days from graduation, only 5 assignments left for class, most of which will be finished by next week, hopefully... and wondering what in the world my April is going to look like, with my Clinical Preceptorship starting and I have to figure out how I'm going to work 3 12-hour shifts a week, but also still stay semi in touch with the rest of my life... It's going to be an interesting last month and a half of school, but exciting, too. I'm just afraid I'm going to turn around and it will be over...
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Circling
Well, I'm sitting in the Beeson Woods office unexpectedly for another two hours with some time to waste, so I figured maybe I should write another update for this journal that I have so poorly neglected since the turn of the year. I think I keep waiting for something "noteworthy" to happen and nothing ever seems enough, or it seems like too much.
A lot has happened in the year so far. I've started and finished an ICU elective and learned so much in a brief 3 weeks; I once again got a small taste of what it will be like after graduation, and returning to the grime of school is less than appealing. I'm halfway through my last semester of college, and could list on two hands what I have left to do before graduation, school-work wise at least. I've prepared and participated in my first real job interview. And am now awaiting the results. Check back in April.
Choir leaves for Chicago on Friday, and I am excited, though probably a little stressed. And trying to avoid thinking about the fact that it's my last tour with choir. This fact has really not sunk in. Like always, God has taken care of everything, even in the middle of our freak outs on whether or not He would (exhibit A- until the end of last week we weren't sure if we were actually going to sing anywhere on Sunday... and now we are singing twice, and eating good, Polish food!) God is too good.
Since I last posted, my family also found out that my Granddaddy (the one who owns the Kaleidoscope Shop) has Acute Myelogenous Leukemia. Which is generally not good, but I am please to report that a month into the diagnosis, he has gone through chemo, been discharged from the hospital, and is doing remarkably well, all things considered. Though, every day, every month, I think is a huge blessing now (not that they weren't and shouldn't have been before). Continued prayers for healing and strength are appreciated. Especially that he will not get an infection, and that as his bone marrow regrows, it will regrow the way it's supposed to, instead of making lots of immature, cancerous cells again. The experience so far, though, has shown me
I have been amazingly blessed, and I really take it for granted every day of my life. In the midst of realizing more and more how blessed I have been, I'm also realizing how great my sin still is, and how in many ways, I've really not tackled or overcome any of my long list of ingrained sin at all (though, I suppose this is the daily, monthly, yearly struggle in Christianity). I'm still selfish, self-centered, prideful, arrogant, lacking in mercy and love for others, and constantly looking for fulfillment in things other than Christ. You'd think Jesus would just get tired of me, huh? His steadfast patience with me is incomprehensible.
I recently purchased a few scholarly books on Harry Potter (yes, I am an obsessed geek), and I have really enjoyed reading them (stick with me, this connects to what I was saying a second ago, I promise...). Right now, I'm in John Granger's The Deathly Hallows Lectures (though, if you're wanting to start out, his 5 Keys to Unlocking Harry Potter or How Harry Cast His Spell might be a better starting place). I've learned a lot about alchemy, particularly literary alchemy and how it can be used as "scaffolding" for literature. Shakespeare and Dante did it. And so did Rowling. And it has been very interesting. Apparently when alchemy was particularly popular, there was "Christian Alchemy," and it's not really a surprise, because the three stages really give an excellent parallel or metaphor for our process of sanctification. What I find particularly interesting is that in every book, Harry goes through the three alchemical stages (black, white, red), but the book series as a whole is also one long alchemical process. Harry has to repeatedly go through the same steps, the same process, on his longer, more complete journey and transformation. And each time, he gets a little closer, and little deeper.
The section on the Hero's Journey (one of the 5 keys, the keys being: narrative misdirection, literary alchemy, the hero's journey, traditional symbolism, and postmodern themes) kind of has the same sentiment. Basically the hero goes through a typical pattern which can be found in harry potter in these stages: privet drive- mundane existence; magical escape- being called on a journey to a magical world; mystery- the trio's "extracurricular" assignment each year; crisis- harry has to choose the right, difficult thing; underground- harry and one or both of friends goes underground to confront evil; battle- fight fight fight!; loss and death- harry loses every year and seems to die; resurrection- but he rises from the dead, in the presence of a symbol of Christ! (See, I really want to read his other books for a break down of this in each book- but think about it, totally true!) But ultimately, John Granger is saying that this structured routine isn't just there because it's nice and easy, but because of the symbolism of the circle. Check this out:
Now every hero's journey is a figurative, completed circle, if not a geometric one, so let's think about what a circle is... a circle is the uniform radiation of a spaceless point, the center, into space. All points of a circle are equidistant from a center point, right? This center, then, really defines the circle, of which it is only an extension. Think of a ripple moving away from a rock dropped in the pond. The rock at the center causes and defines the circle rippling away from it. A circle, which is visible, is only intelligible and understandable because of the defining and spaceless center that is usually invisible and unknowable itself. (This, incidentally, is why a circle is is an adequate, even profound representation of God as Trinity, with God the Father as Center, the Word as circle, and Holy Spirit as proceeding radiation from the Center. The Father is only knowable through His Word and because of the Holy Spirit; each is distinct, and the center is logically, but not temporally, prior).
...
Harry went underground repeatedly in Deathly Hallows, most importantly in choosing to dig Dobby's grave, because each descent into the underworld was a dying to himself from which, remember, he either saved lives, recovered lost treasure, or was enlightened. Imagine the world as a circle; every descent was Harry's movement toward the center and source of life and away from the periphery of ego and the fear of death.
I know I just went on a long tangent to get to the point I'm trying to make, but it was important to see how these thoughts came together.
Just like Harry is always going on this circle every year, repeating the same steps over and over again, and yet, also getting closer to the center of the circle every time, becoming more and more like a symbol of Christ every time, until, by the last book, he actually arises as a Christ-symbol in his actual death and resurrection (though I would definitely argue Harry is more often a good symbol of the Christian walk, than of Christ- and even in this, don't we all die and live again in Christ? Don't we all have a cross to carry? Don't we all have to repeatedly die to our sinful desires?), we also are constantly going through a repetitive circle, going through the same patterns of sin, repentance, faith, growth, sin, etc., and yet each time we make the circle, we get a little closer to the center. We go a little deeper, and learn a little more. Another layer of the dragon's skin is removed (though, I suppose in Lewis, Aslan just went for the kill with the dragon skin... speaking of- Dawn Treader- December! I'm almost excited as I am for Harry Potter in November!)
Sometimes it is so discouraging to realize that I am constantly returning back to the same sinful habits I thought I had really made improvement on. Why do I always find myself again feeling puffed up and arrogant about myself? Why am I constantly crashing back down when I realize that God is, in fact, still calling me to be patient and wait for His timing and not my own? When just a few months ago, I really thought I had arrived at a good place of peace? Why do I keep coming back to the other end of the circle? Maybe because that's the way God has chosen to let us live out Sanctification. To continually go through black, white, and red stages, to continually loop through our personal journeys, as we inevitably get closer to Him, the Center. And, it's interesting that, in the symbol of the Circle, Jesus is the visible Circle, and we are called to follow Jesus, take up our Cross, die our own deaths, follow his circle. ? And I love thinking of the Spirit, rippling out, and we have no idea where the ripples end, how far the Spirit reaches in its effect, reaching more, and also drawing us in closer to the Center.
You can see I've really enjoyed exploring the limits of this symbol in my own head. I'm curious if it resonates with anyone else.
I've been having as much fun with the alchemical stages, which I only briefly mentioned- black is the stage where everything is stripped away until only what is essential remains (for big picture, think book 5), white is the illumination, where new truths are discovered, and red is when the truths that are discovered are revealed in actions. Romeo and Juliet follows these stages. Tale of Two Cities follows these stages. Apparently most of Shakespeare does. It was very popular, because in alchemy, it was thought that the alchemist went through internal, personal changes as he observed the changes in the materials, and it was therefore also thought that while audience members observed a change on the stage, it would also effect a change in them. While I'd be hesitant to jump on the "change in chemical material" train, I'm totally ready to jump on the literary alchemy train- of course watching a play or reading a book has an effect on you- because you do take the journey with the characters.
Anyway. As you can see, I'm just as obsessed with Harry as always. And also still as wordy as always. Now I bet you wish I hadn't updated... hah!
A lot has happened in the year so far. I've started and finished an ICU elective and learned so much in a brief 3 weeks; I once again got a small taste of what it will be like after graduation, and returning to the grime of school is less than appealing. I'm halfway through my last semester of college, and could list on two hands what I have left to do before graduation, school-work wise at least. I've prepared and participated in my first real job interview. And am now awaiting the results. Check back in April.
Choir leaves for Chicago on Friday, and I am excited, though probably a little stressed. And trying to avoid thinking about the fact that it's my last tour with choir. This fact has really not sunk in. Like always, God has taken care of everything, even in the middle of our freak outs on whether or not He would (exhibit A- until the end of last week we weren't sure if we were actually going to sing anywhere on Sunday... and now we are singing twice, and eating good, Polish food!) God is too good.
Since I last posted, my family also found out that my Granddaddy (the one who owns the Kaleidoscope Shop) has Acute Myelogenous Leukemia. Which is generally not good, but I am please to report that a month into the diagnosis, he has gone through chemo, been discharged from the hospital, and is doing remarkably well, all things considered. Though, every day, every month, I think is a huge blessing now (not that they weren't and shouldn't have been before). Continued prayers for healing and strength are appreciated. Especially that he will not get an infection, and that as his bone marrow regrows, it will regrow the way it's supposed to, instead of making lots of immature, cancerous cells again. The experience so far, though, has shown me
- How amazing my grandparents are, in their faith, and in their life. Grandmother had such wisdom when quoting from Daniel 3 when I visited: "If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God we serve is able to save us from it, and he will rescue us from your hand, O king. But even if he does not, we want you to know, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the image of gold you have set up." Not only do they have an amazing attitude, but Granddaddy also walked a mile a day every day he was in the hospital. He amazes me. They amaze me. I can only hope to be a shadow of the the amazing people they are, and that my own parents are. God has surrounded me with amazing people who truly love and serve the Lord, and live out hospitality and Christ-like love every day.
- How amazing my friends are. Again, I have been blessed beyond all that I deserve in the friends God has given me at Samford. Their prayers and support made the times of uncertainty these past few weeks, and I'm sure the times of uncertainty to come so much more bearable. That, combined with the number of texts, messages, etc. of people praying for my interview last Friday is a testament of how many people love me and are praying for me, and is something I hope I never forget, and something I need to stop taking advantage of.
I have been amazingly blessed, and I really take it for granted every day of my life. In the midst of realizing more and more how blessed I have been, I'm also realizing how great my sin still is, and how in many ways, I've really not tackled or overcome any of my long list of ingrained sin at all (though, I suppose this is the daily, monthly, yearly struggle in Christianity). I'm still selfish, self-centered, prideful, arrogant, lacking in mercy and love for others, and constantly looking for fulfillment in things other than Christ. You'd think Jesus would just get tired of me, huh? His steadfast patience with me is incomprehensible.
I recently purchased a few scholarly books on Harry Potter (yes, I am an obsessed geek), and I have really enjoyed reading them (stick with me, this connects to what I was saying a second ago, I promise...). Right now, I'm in John Granger's The Deathly Hallows Lectures (though, if you're wanting to start out, his 5 Keys to Unlocking Harry Potter or How Harry Cast His Spell might be a better starting place). I've learned a lot about alchemy, particularly literary alchemy and how it can be used as "scaffolding" for literature. Shakespeare and Dante did it. And so did Rowling. And it has been very interesting. Apparently when alchemy was particularly popular, there was "Christian Alchemy," and it's not really a surprise, because the three stages really give an excellent parallel or metaphor for our process of sanctification. What I find particularly interesting is that in every book, Harry goes through the three alchemical stages (black, white, red), but the book series as a whole is also one long alchemical process. Harry has to repeatedly go through the same steps, the same process, on his longer, more complete journey and transformation. And each time, he gets a little closer, and little deeper.
The section on the Hero's Journey (one of the 5 keys, the keys being: narrative misdirection, literary alchemy, the hero's journey, traditional symbolism, and postmodern themes) kind of has the same sentiment. Basically the hero goes through a typical pattern which can be found in harry potter in these stages: privet drive- mundane existence; magical escape- being called on a journey to a magical world; mystery- the trio's "extracurricular" assignment each year; crisis- harry has to choose the right, difficult thing; underground- harry and one or both of friends goes underground to confront evil; battle- fight fight fight!; loss and death- harry loses every year and seems to die; resurrection- but he rises from the dead, in the presence of a symbol of Christ! (See, I really want to read his other books for a break down of this in each book- but think about it, totally true!) But ultimately, John Granger is saying that this structured routine isn't just there because it's nice and easy, but because of the symbolism of the circle. Check this out:
Now every hero's journey is a figurative, completed circle, if not a geometric one, so let's think about what a circle is... a circle is the uniform radiation of a spaceless point, the center, into space. All points of a circle are equidistant from a center point, right? This center, then, really defines the circle, of which it is only an extension. Think of a ripple moving away from a rock dropped in the pond. The rock at the center causes and defines the circle rippling away from it. A circle, which is visible, is only intelligible and understandable because of the defining and spaceless center that is usually invisible and unknowable itself. (This, incidentally, is why a circle is is an adequate, even profound representation of God as Trinity, with God the Father as Center, the Word as circle, and Holy Spirit as proceeding radiation from the Center. The Father is only knowable through His Word and because of the Holy Spirit; each is distinct, and the center is logically, but not temporally, prior).
...
Harry went underground repeatedly in Deathly Hallows, most importantly in choosing to dig Dobby's grave, because each descent into the underworld was a dying to himself from which, remember, he either saved lives, recovered lost treasure, or was enlightened. Imagine the world as a circle; every descent was Harry's movement toward the center and source of life and away from the periphery of ego and the fear of death.
I know I just went on a long tangent to get to the point I'm trying to make, but it was important to see how these thoughts came together.
Just like Harry is always going on this circle every year, repeating the same steps over and over again, and yet, also getting closer to the center of the circle every time, becoming more and more like a symbol of Christ every time, until, by the last book, he actually arises as a Christ-symbol in his actual death and resurrection (though I would definitely argue Harry is more often a good symbol of the Christian walk, than of Christ- and even in this, don't we all die and live again in Christ? Don't we all have a cross to carry? Don't we all have to repeatedly die to our sinful desires?), we also are constantly going through a repetitive circle, going through the same patterns of sin, repentance, faith, growth, sin, etc., and yet each time we make the circle, we get a little closer to the center. We go a little deeper, and learn a little more. Another layer of the dragon's skin is removed (though, I suppose in Lewis, Aslan just went for the kill with the dragon skin... speaking of- Dawn Treader- December! I'm almost excited as I am for Harry Potter in November!)
Sometimes it is so discouraging to realize that I am constantly returning back to the same sinful habits I thought I had really made improvement on. Why do I always find myself again feeling puffed up and arrogant about myself? Why am I constantly crashing back down when I realize that God is, in fact, still calling me to be patient and wait for His timing and not my own? When just a few months ago, I really thought I had arrived at a good place of peace? Why do I keep coming back to the other end of the circle? Maybe because that's the way God has chosen to let us live out Sanctification. To continually go through black, white, and red stages, to continually loop through our personal journeys, as we inevitably get closer to Him, the Center. And, it's interesting that, in the symbol of the Circle, Jesus is the visible Circle, and we are called to follow Jesus, take up our Cross, die our own deaths, follow his circle. ? And I love thinking of the Spirit, rippling out, and we have no idea where the ripples end, how far the Spirit reaches in its effect, reaching more, and also drawing us in closer to the Center.
You can see I've really enjoyed exploring the limits of this symbol in my own head. I'm curious if it resonates with anyone else.
I've been having as much fun with the alchemical stages, which I only briefly mentioned- black is the stage where everything is stripped away until only what is essential remains (for big picture, think book 5), white is the illumination, where new truths are discovered, and red is when the truths that are discovered are revealed in actions. Romeo and Juliet follows these stages. Tale of Two Cities follows these stages. Apparently most of Shakespeare does. It was very popular, because in alchemy, it was thought that the alchemist went through internal, personal changes as he observed the changes in the materials, and it was therefore also thought that while audience members observed a change on the stage, it would also effect a change in them. While I'd be hesitant to jump on the "change in chemical material" train, I'm totally ready to jump on the literary alchemy train- of course watching a play or reading a book has an effect on you- because you do take the journey with the characters.
Anyway. As you can see, I'm just as obsessed with Harry as always. And also still as wordy as always. Now I bet you wish I hadn't updated... hah!
Friday, January 1, 2010
Twenty Ten
Well, the end of the semester has come and gone, as has the end of 2009. 2010 has definitely snuck up on me. This is definitely going to be a big year of transitions. I'm coming to the end of my last long break between semesters of schooling- the next time I return home at the end of a semester, I won't be going back to Samford. And I won't be staying home for the whole summer, but moving all my stuff to wherever it is that I'm going to be next... a lot of changes, for sure. Going from a little ol' nursing student to a real live working nurse. Woah. This Christmas it was weird to think about the fact that next Christmas I may or may not be home- who knows what my work schedule will be like, and there's a good possibility I'll be working on Christmas... very weird. Live is definitely moving forward. It's exciting, but just weird, because everything from here on out feels so 'unknown'. There's no, "well, I know for the next 4 years I'll be at some college" that leading up to high school had. It's just... well, I'll be working as a nurse. somewhere. in the world. okay, probably in the southeast.
What have I been doing with my Christmas break? Mainly enjoying relaxing. I watched some Monk, watched some Big Bang Theory, rewatched A Very Potter Musical (and downloaded the soundtrack), and watched Little White Lie, a webseries put out by most of the same people who put out AVPM, so I've kind of been on a StarKidPotter kick. It really should come as no surprise that I would adamantly love a musical having to do with Harry Potter, considering my obsession for both. This may be a little pathetic to admit, but I'm already kind of squealing over thoughts of Harry Potter goodies 2010 is going to hold. The theme park is opening this Spring, and I am fully hoping to make it there this summer. And then Deathly Hallows part one comes out at the end of this year. Which makes me really really excited. Mainly because I'm expecting it to be awesome. (totally awesome... O.o?) [EDIT- and now, there's also A Very Potter Sequel to look forward to this summer. 2010 really is going to be totally awesome!]
So, as you can see... I've not been doing much except sitting around thinking about my love for Harry Potter. And Darren Criss. He's pretty much a cutie. I mean, A. he's Harry Potter, B. he plays guitar, and C. remember that time he conquered that dragon's heart with his guitar? He's about to do it with yours.
This post has turned out to be pretty useless. But I felt I needed to update with *something*. Maybe you'll disagree. At one point I had this whole post in my head about the different views of Santa. But I think that moment has passed.
I'm heading back to school on Sunday for janterm goodness. I'll be working in an ICU for three weeks- I'm sure I'm going to learn a lot. I'm definitely looking forward to it. I haven't been to the hospital since before thanksgiving... weird. Other than that, I don't have much plans for January. Hanging out with other people in Bham hopefully. I need some sort of knitting project... and I have a lot of dvds to watch through. I'm considering rewatching some seasons of Grey's Anatomy... of course, I think I'll definitely be starting with my brand new (almost) complete series of 7th Heaven. Cheesy, yes, but I can't help kind of loving that show. Plus I've never watched the early seasons in order. This is very exciting.
What have I been doing with my Christmas break? Mainly enjoying relaxing. I watched some Monk, watched some Big Bang Theory, rewatched A Very Potter Musical (and downloaded the soundtrack), and watched Little White Lie, a webseries put out by most of the same people who put out AVPM, so I've kind of been on a StarKidPotter kick. It really should come as no surprise that I would adamantly love a musical having to do with Harry Potter, considering my obsession for both. This may be a little pathetic to admit, but I'm already kind of squealing over thoughts of Harry Potter goodies 2010 is going to hold. The theme park is opening this Spring, and I am fully hoping to make it there this summer. And then Deathly Hallows part one comes out at the end of this year. Which makes me really really excited. Mainly because I'm expecting it to be awesome. (totally awesome... O.o?) [EDIT- and now, there's also A Very Potter Sequel to look forward to this summer. 2010 really is going to be totally awesome!]
So, as you can see... I've not been doing much except sitting around thinking about my love for Harry Potter. And Darren Criss. He's pretty much a cutie. I mean, A. he's Harry Potter, B. he plays guitar, and C. remember that time he conquered that dragon's heart with his guitar? He's about to do it with yours.
This post has turned out to be pretty useless. But I felt I needed to update with *something*. Maybe you'll disagree. At one point I had this whole post in my head about the different views of Santa. But I think that moment has passed.
I'm heading back to school on Sunday for janterm goodness. I'll be working in an ICU for three weeks- I'm sure I'm going to learn a lot. I'm definitely looking forward to it. I haven't been to the hospital since before thanksgiving... weird. Other than that, I don't have much plans for January. Hanging out with other people in Bham hopefully. I need some sort of knitting project... and I have a lot of dvds to watch through. I'm considering rewatching some seasons of Grey's Anatomy... of course, I think I'll definitely be starting with my brand new (almost) complete series of 7th Heaven. Cheesy, yes, but I can't help kind of loving that show. Plus I've never watched the early seasons in order. This is very exciting.
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